Summer Bucket List: Storm King Art Center

The summer bucket list continues! I am only two weeks behind with this post! Can we pretend it's because I'm too busy having fun, and not because I'm working all the time?

A couple of Sundays ago, my friend Dahlia and I ventured out of town to the Storm King Art Center, in New Windsor, NY. It's basically a huge, sprawling outside sculpture garden which you can read about here. It's always nice to get out of the city for the day, especially on a beautiful, sunny (if hot) day. I had never been before, but I had heard it was beautiful, and it certainly did not disappoint.

I tried to reach the statue! So close, and yet so far...

 My favorite part, I think was the special exhibit on sculptures with water, especially the pink ones you can see here. They looked sort of like they were made of melted wax, and they were also neon pink so that was cool.

Can you see me poking out behind the fountain?

Ahhh, giant Buddha, don't smush me!

The other highlight was the beautiful landscape, which would have been worth visiting even if there hadn't been any art. The water, trees, and rolling green fields with wide open skies were, to put it mildly, a bit of a change from my usual surroundings. There were also some sculptures integrated into the landscape itself, like Maya Lin's waves and the stone wall you see me standing next to in the first picture.

The view...

For a day like this, it's important to wear comfortable shoes to be ready for a lot of walking, and lightweight clothing because the sun was so strong. I also go to wear my fedora-- score! I love wearing my fedora, but it's rare that I get to do so without people thinking I'm either married or a hipster. So I embraced the opportunity.

What are your favorite outdoor spaces for summer?

What I'm wearing: Eshakti skirt (similar here), Kosher Casual shirt, Bare Traps sandals (similar here), fedora bought at Santa Monica Pier.

Love Wins.

No matter your politics, whether you think it's for better or for worse, I think we can all agree that last week, America changed forever.

All rainbow, all the time.

Having grown up on the Upper West Side before it was all banks and pharmacies, I met my first gay couples as a very young child, and I don't remember ever thinking it was particularly weird. I also remember, when a friend came out to me for the first time, simultaneously realizing that it was a very big deal for her, and feeling like it didn't really make a difference to me. However, being straight myself, I don't think I ever thought seriously about the opportunities that I took for granted that were being denied to my friends until the amendments against gay marriage began to pass across the country.

How cool is it that this baby will grow up thinking
that gay marriage is just marriage?

I think that's why, sort of to my surprise, I was so moved and excited following the Supreme Court ruling on Friday. Certainly, my gay friends still face many challenges that I would never have to think about, and because of that the fight isn't over. However, knowing that they can get married, that their children will not have to worry about whether both of their parents are legally considered their parents, that they will be able to visit each other if something happens and someone is in the hospital-- that is so huge. And also, knowing that the government is finally recognizing what has been clear to me as I have watched some of my friends fall in love-- that there is no way that these couples being together could possibly do anything other than sanctify the institution of marriage-- is so moving. Not to mention the fact that (yes, in our East Coast bubble), my nephews and niece and the children I might have one day will grow up just calling it "marriage" instead of "gay marriage," is nothing short of extraordinary.

So in celebration of all of this, and in solidarity with a community that is still working to protect itself and its rights, following Father's Day (Observed), my cousins and I headed down to the parade. Pride is always very festive and super fun (if not always PG-rated), but it felt especially special this year, with people dressed up as brides, carrying banners that said "Love Wins," and, in one case, holding a sign that said "I've been with my partner for 49 years and now, finally, we are equal in the eyes of the law." Whatever the religious and cultural and political issues, to me, this kind of love overcomes it all. And love is love.

Cousins! Believe it or not, we are actually related.

So here some of the better shots from the afternoon. (I didn't have a great spot, so this was sort of the best I could do.)

Love is love. Love wins.

What I'm wearing: Jones New York top via TJ Maxx (similar here), Boden pleated skirt

How To #3: How to Have an Awesome Clothing Swap

This one goes out to Sarit and Ma'ayan, who hosted a rocking clothing swap a couple of weeks ago.

Loyal readers, as you know, I'm in the middle of a spending freeze. (For more about that, see here.) I'll write more about it when it's over next week, but in general, it's been going very well. I've been doing a good job of reacquainting myself with my wardrobe, and I have a much better sense of what I actually wear. However, as much as I enjoy spending no money, sometimes it's fun to have something new!

Enter: Clothing swap. In case you don't know, a clothing swap is a very simple concept. Email a bunch of your friends (of different size and styles) and tell them to clean out their closets. Have them gather in a mutually agreed upon location. Organize everyone's items into categories (e.g. dresses, sweaters, accessories, etc.) so that people can find things. And then root through the piles and try things on!

A clothing swap is great for a number of reasons. First, it's a great excuse to clean out the closet. (And anything that isn't taken at the end of the night can be donated to charity.) Second, it's a way to refresh your wardrobe without spending any money. Third, it's a built in set of opinions as you try things on, so if you're not sure if you look good in something, resources are easy to come by. And finally, because everything is free, it can be a chance to take a fashion risk and try something you wouldn't ordinarily wear. Worst comes to worst, you end up giving it away, or bringing it to the next clothing swap!

At clothing swaps in the past, I've been a little overzealous and taken things I didn't end up wearing. So I came to this one determined to only take things that I thought I could picture fitting into my wardrobe. Here are the results:

The sailor skirt, which I am excited to wear
when it gets cooler outside.

The red dress! I wore it today.

And some stripes via a scarf and sweater.

Everything I put on (except for the scarf, which was sort of just to hide my bad hair day), someone thought it was what I had worn there. I took that as a good sign that I had chosen things that would likely wear in real life. And indeed, I have already worn two of the five things I took. So I think I did better this time than in the past. And if not, well... now I'll have something to bring to the next swap!

Have you ever swapped it up? What's your favorite item you've ever swapped for?

Summer Bucket List: Outside Music, AKA Philharmonic in the Park

When I was a kid, my mom used to take us to concerts at Lincoln Center on Saturday afternoons. They were called the Young People's Concerts (although my sister Sarah resolutely insisted on called them the Dumb People's Concerts) and they were meant to introduce kids to classical music at young age so that they would grow up with an appreciation for it.

Sorry you can't see the whole skirt, but it was a crazy mob scene and there was nowhere else for me to move in order to get a fuller picts. You get the idea-- it's a maxi skirt, the print goes down to the ground. 

It's hard to say whether the concerts did their job or not, but I certainly find that there are days when I prefer classical music, so I guess they were at least somewhat successful. In honor of my appreciation of such things, and in my desire to keep on keeping on with the summer bucket list, I joined my parents for Philharmonic in the park on Wednesday night.

See, crazy mob scene.

Philharmonic in the Park is an old New York tradition, and this year, in honor of its 50th anniversary, they're doing five concerts (one in each of the boroughs other than Staten Island, and two in Manhattan. Sorry Staten Island.) They tend to play old favorites that the crowd will recognize, and people bring picnics and it's great fun all around. Unfortunately, this year, it rained on and off, so they ended up cutting a lot of the set, including Gershwin, which is one of my favorites, and Appalachian Spring, which is my dad's all time favorite. So it was sort of a bust for the music, although the suite from West Side Story was great. And it's nice to just sit outside and listen to music. Even when you end up looking like this:

Yup, that's my dad. He finally appears on the blog!
In honor of Father's Day. 

And at the end-- fireworks!

 When dressing for something like Philharmonic in the Park, it's important to remember that it gets colder at night. It was already a little cool out on Wednesday, so I made sure to dress in layers, including a jacket and a scarf. I also went with a maxi skirt, which kept my legs covered and warm, and also is (in my opinion) more comfortable for things like ground sitting than jeans, because it's less constricting. Sorry there's not a better picture of the skirt, but you can see the whole thing here. The summer fun continues!

What I'm wearing: Papermoon maxi skirt via Stitch Fix (similar here), Tahari 3/4 sleeve shirt (similar here), GAP Factory jean jacket (similar here), Naot sandals

So Much Joy!

After what happened in Charleston today, I felt like I couldn't update the blog. It didn't seem right to focus on something admittedly frivolous in light of the horrible hatred and violence that caused nine lives to be snuffed out.

And then I went to one of the most beautiful l'chayims I've ever been to. A l'chayim, for those of you who are not familiar, is an engagement party of sorts, but less formal. It usually happens immediately following an engagement, and is a chance to mark the first step on the journey of a couple deciding to spend their lives together.

My second year of grad school, I had a chevruta (or study partner) named Alex. Alex was dating a ton the semester we were learning together, and one of the guys he went out with was my younger sister's dear friend from Hebrew School, also named Alex. (I know, confusing.) Even though they met online, my family apparently gets credit for fake introducing them! (We actually had them each for Rosh Hashanah one night apart from each other shortly before they started dating.) Hooray!

Long story short, their dating turned into a serious relationship, which turned into them getting engaged on Sunday. And tonight, I was lucky enough to help them celebrate this wonderful moment in their lives.

Yoni told me to growl like a tiger. Apparently I am very
obedient. Awks.

I've been lucky to spend time with Alex and Alex as a couple, as one Alex is the rabbinic intern at my parents' synagogue, and the other Alex has been coming to our family for Jewish holidays for a number of years. I can honestly say that they are one of the best couples I've ever met. The way they talk about each other, and look at each other, is magical. It's so comforting to know that, in a really dark time, there are sparks of love bringing light into the world.

Additionally, striped shirt Alex is maybe this blog's biggest fan. So the least I could do was put him on the blog in honor of this momentous occasion. He wanted everyone to know that he's wearing a shirt from TopMen, which is the men's shop of TopShop. Stylin'.

Rachel sandwich with Alex bread!
AKA me lucky enough to stand between the two parts of
 one of the best couples I've ever met.

So in honor of their engagement, and the reminder that there is still love in the world to counter hate, this blog post goes out to Alex and Alex. May you always be as happy together as you are today. Mazal tov!

What I'm wearing: Boden dress, Kosher Casual shell, Bare Traps sandals (similar here)

Q&A: Normal and Modest in the Summer

Remember when I was all excited to post picture of work appropriate clothing on the blog because I'm working full time now? And remember how I haven't done it at all? It's not because I don't love you. It's just because, it's sort of awkward to say, "Hey, student, can you take a picture of my outfit?" So I haven't figured out a system yet. Maybe soon. I'm working on it.

In the meantime, Q&A is back! Today's question is anonymous, but I think relevant to all of us modest dressers out there. Here we go:

Question:
In the winter, I find it's fairly easy to dress modestly and still blend in-- long sleeves, lots of layers, boots, and tights are the norm. However, in the summer, I sometimes find it's hard to both maintain my standards of modesty, look normal, and not melt to death. Any tips? -- Anonymous

Answer:
Ah yes. There is nothing that makes someone feel quite as conspicuous as wearing sleeves past the elbows when it's 90 degrees and humid outside. I have certainly been there, and it is not always easy. While there's no fail-safe way to deal with this challenge, here are some tips.

Luckily, fashion has been on the modest girls' side of late. The maxi skirt trend has been here for the last couple of years, and it looks like it's here to stay, at least for now. The good thing about maxi skirts is that they are super comfortable. The bad news is that most of them are too casual for any work environment that isn't super informal. However, they're great for the weekend or a fun evening out. You can find good options here, here and here.

It's true, most people where longer skirts with sleeveless tops in the summer. However, popover shirts are having a fashion moment, and they usually have 3/4 sleeves, which works out great for people who like longer sleeves! Additionally, they tend to be super lightweight, which makes them great for summer. Sometimes a looser shirt with more coverage is cooler than a tighter short sleeved or sleeveless shirt, so don't be afraid of the sleeves. Look for things in cotton or other light fabrics that breathe easily, like this, this or this.

Remember that a lot of people, even those who generally wear pants or shorts, choose to wear skirts in the summer. They're often lighter and airier than pants, even when they have a little more length. Again, look for lightweight fabrics. The GAP is currently selling a number of midi skirts right now in a light cotton which would likely be airy even on the hottest of days. They look super cute with flats and even a fedora, for those of you who are so inclined, to give you a nice vintage-y look.

Nobody wants to wear sweaters in the summer, so sleeveless dresses can seem unappealing if you don't want to wear a shirt underneath (which is certainly a distinctive look.) Try out wrap-style dresses, which might require a cami, but still blend nicely and can be good for hotter weather. Also check out places like Nordstrom, where you can search by sleeve length; Boden, where they have many options with sleeves; or Eshakti, where you can customize to add sleeves.

In terms of skirt length. You know that I am the world's biggest proponent of flats. Not only do I never wear heels during the week, I usually don't even wear them on Shabbat. However, there is something to be said for a good pair of wedges in order to balance out a longer skirt and make it look less conspicuous. Even a whiny heel wearer like me can find a pair of wedges that are totally bearable. Just make sure you choose a good brand. I suggest something like Aerosoles, Born, or Dr. Scholls.

If you cover your hair, I don't have a huge amount to say, as a non-hair coverer. However, fedoras are everywhere these days (thank you hipsters), and headscarves/ thick headbands also seem to be having a moment. So at least outside, you will find many like you.

Finally, remember that people are not looking at you that closely. So in terms of looking normal, people are not paying nearly as much attention to what you're wearing as you think. This is not to say that people won't notice your total fabulousness, but if you feel like you look really different from everyone else, it is unlikely that they really notice. Just wear what's comfortable for you and you'll look great!

How do you dress for modesty in the heat?

Summer Bucket List: Coney Island!

Summer fun continues, friends! I'm making good progress on my bucket list, but all the fun means I'm behind on my blogging. So while I crossed something else off the list today, let's backtrack to last Friday, when some of my friends joined me on a Coney Island adventure.

Unlike many people, I suppose, I actually love the beach in almost any weather. Of course, it's nice when it's hot, and you can go in the water. I also love it in the late fall, when it's sort of cold and gloomy. Last Friday was unseasonably cool and cloudy, but it meant we had the beach all to ourselves. I'm telling you-- just put on a sweatshirt and you'll have a great day.

Of course, there are many other fun things to do at Coney Island, including going out on the pier, seeing the Brooklyn Cyclones play, and hanging out at Luna Park and riding the Cyclone. We mostly stuck to the beach, but I hope to go back later in the summer to see the Cyclones play, so hopefully I can get some rides in then as well.

Sarit's Instagram Masterpiece

There's something really beautiful about the beach on a cloudy day, I think. And it means you get to spend as many tries as possible to get a picture of yourself jumping in the air without anyone getting in the way, so that's always a win.

The beautiful view from the pier

Coney Island, guys. The 50s live on, in the best way possible. Where do you like to go for kitschy fun?

What I'm wearing: Esprit sweatshirt (super old), GAP long sleeved shirt (similar here), Lucky Brand jeans via TJ Maxx, chacos (not shown, because who wears shoes on the beach?)

The Giant Fail: Stitch Fix Review June 2015

Oh Stitch Fix, why do you do this to me? You send me amazing fixes on the odd numbers, and then terrible ones on the evens. What's that about? Suffice it to say that fix #6 was not a success. Ladies and gentlemen (because I know you're out there), we have our first 0/5 fix. Sad Rachel.

(For info about how Stitch Fix works, see my earlier post here.)

I asked Alison to style me again this time, and asked for things that are color, and things that are work-appropriate. While I mostly get where she was going, there were a couple of exceptions where I sort of wondered, what was she thinking? But it was a fail. Let's take a look.

My styling card! Good, but only in theory.

My total would have been $227.50 if I had kept everything. 

Skies are Blue Winston Button Down Blouse in Green-- $28.00

This shirt looked good until I put it on. And then... not so much. First of all, the material was super scratchy. Second, it looked like a maternity shirt-- not what you want to see when you are tiny on top and sort of bottom heavy. (Believe it or not, it looks better in the pics than in real life. It was not pretty.)

Also, it seemed to be shorter in the back than in the front. What's what about? Is that for hiding a second person underneath?
I googled around to find how other people wore this, and everyone had the same complaint as me. Also, the price for others was higher, so I wonder if everyone returns this, so they discounted it to try to get rid of it? Well, Stitch Fix, you won't fool me! Nice try.
Status: Return

Fun2Fun Binder Tie Neck Top in Pink-- $48

This shirt was the most promising in the bunch. I really liked the concept and it was super soft. But then there were some problems.

                                                    

First, the arms had elastic that was SO TIGHT. Like, cutting off my circulation tight. I know that my arms are a little out of proportion in size based on the rest of my body, but this was really ridiculous.

Second, it reminded me a lot of the shirt I got in Fix #3. I love that shirt, but I definitely don't need two of them.
Third, while it fit around the hips, it was too loose on top-- I could tell I would have to keep adjusting it to stop my tank top from showing.
Finally, the material didn't look so nice up close. If I'm going to spend $48 on a shirt, I need it to look a little more high quality
Status: Returned

Street Level Morris Braided Handle Tote in Blue-- $78

In theory, I could have gotten behind this bag. I liked the color. But then I held it up and it was HUGE. Even bigger than my backpack. Not being a mom, if I don't have said backpack, I have no reason to carry this much stuff.

Also, the bag smelled sort of funny. It probably would have gone away, but for $78, I can't deal with a smell. In fact, I'm not sure there's much that can get me behind a $78 bag, but it would certainly have to be love, and this was not.

It did have a messenger strap, which was cool. Oh well. Good bye, bag.

Status: Return

Level 99 Patrick Cropped Chino Pants in Light Blue-- $88

Not much to say. Unflattering in the thighs. Impractical (too casual for work, too much like other things i have for weekends.) Color that stains easily. Super expensive for casual pants. No thank you.

Status: Return

La Made Ida Striped Shirt Dress in Navy-- $98

 I saved the worst for last. Oh, this dress. Sooooo bad. First of all, it is basically a glorified beach cover-up, and who spends $98 on a beach cover up? Second, this is NOT a shape that works for the pear shaped among us. It hugged my thighs like crazy. Why would you give a dress in this silhouette to a bottom heavy person? Makes no sense. In case you're wondering why there are no pics of me wearing it, it's because I looked 5 months pregnant, and even I have limits.

Also, the fabric was much flimsier than it should have been for the price. I assume that it was sent to me because I pinned a bunch of striped dresses, but they were all with a full skirt. This is the opposite of that. BAD. Good bye, terrible dress. You will not make me feel bad about myself anymore.

Status: Returned

I confess that it was sad to get this bad of a box during the spending freeze, when I have extra money around. Perhaps this was my punishment for getting a box during the freeze? Could be...

So you might be thinking, wow Rachel, that's a massive fail. Are you done with Stitch Fix? Nope! Of all of my bad fixes, this is the one that was most on target. There was nothing in here where I thought, Why on earth was this sent to me? It was the right idea, but then very off. Also, it's still so exciting when my box comes. And remember-- it's only clothing! A bad box is not the end of the world. So let's keep on keeping on.

Are you ready to order your own Stitch Fix???