One Month to Go! So I'm Getting Real.

Guys, it has been a big week. I saw my first ever ocean reacting to a tropical storm. (Crazy.) I ran a 10k and set a personal best with a crazy negative split. (More on that later, including the definition of a negative split.) I wrote 15(!) pages of my dissertation proposal. (For those of you keeping track who thought I had already finished a draft, the answer is that is true, but I decided it was bad so I threw it out and started again. If you are wondering if I am insane, the answer might be yes.) And last night, I reached peak happiness, when my lifelong (or yearlong) dream was finally realized and I got to go SEE HAMILTON. Was it as good as everyone said? Yes. Did I cry for almost the whole second act? Yes. I am afraid nothing will ever be that good again? Yes. Lin Manuel Miranda, if you are reading this blog (hey, you never know!), you are a genius and I am sort of obsessed with you in a not at all creepy way. Thank you for sharing your art with the world. And please let me know how I can go again! Ok? Thanks!

This was taken after the 10k, but it could have been
me yesterday on Hamilton day.

Anyway. It is one month until HM Day, which is half-marathon day. Eek! So in honor of this occasion, I'm going to get real with all of you. Like many people (and especially women) out there, I spend way too much time worrying about how I look. I wish I didn't. I wish I felt good about my body every day, no matter what. I wish I could always focus on the amazing things my body could do, instead of what it looked like. In fact, one of the reasons I started this blog was to force myself to stop hiding, start wearing clothes that fit, and learn to talk about myself and how I look in positive ways. It's actually been a mostly successful endeavor, which I feel glad about, and I'm hoping to get back into blogging more regularly now that I'm on a regular schedule again.

Bat Mitzvah Rachel

I don't remember when I started feeling self conscious about my body. Maybe it's just (unfortunately) a normal learned behavior in our society? But either way, the larger problem for much of my adolescence was that I wasn't healthy, or treating my body well. I played sports (extremely poorly), but I also ate bagels and plain pasta basically every day and many snickers bars. Every year, I would go to the doctor and she would suggest gently that perhaps I should change my eating habits and try to lose a little weight, or at least not gain more. And every year, I would be  extremely motivated for about three days and then would go back to normal. By the time I was 14, I was 5'3", 200 pounds, and in pretty terrible shape. I wanted to look different, but I didn't know how.

The successful racers

Sometimes people ask me how I lost all that weight. The answer is a complicated one. First, I didn't lose it all at once. It came off in blocks, and then it would stop again. Second, I never decided to go on a diet. Instead, I decided to try to eat more salad and discovered I actually liked many vegetables. I stopped buying so many candy bars. I tried to stop eating my feelings. (It worked sometimes.) Third, I got an iPod. I know this sounds weird, but it really changed my relationship to exercise. When I didn't have to lug around a discman (remember those????) going to the gym or for a run was suddenly more more enjoyable.

The struggle still continued, and does sometimes. I try to focus on how I feel and how my clothes fit, rather than a number on a scale. These days, I also do some strength training, which is a new challenge for me and sometimes makes me feel very hardcore (like the time I did 10 push ups and then leg pressed my body weight! Yes, I did make people congratulate me. I'm not ashamed.) I also realized that exercise helps me with my anxiety, which means that when I feel bad, I specifically try to get myself outside. It doesn't always work, but there is something to be said for the idea that one healthy choice leads to another.

So proud of my mom, who ran her first 5K!

 The other thing I realized, though, is that I feel really STRONG right now. And that's so cool! I'm not sure I ever felt this strong before. I first felt it consciously on Sunday, when, as the 10K went on, I started running faster, instead of running out of steam. I ended up doing the second 3 miles more than a minute and a half faster than the first three miles (that's a negative split), which is something that I've never done before. And when I was done, I felt like I could keep going, instead of totally exhausted and beaten down. Obviously this is a good thing, since I'm supposed to run 13 miles in exactly one month. But it's also really amazing because I'm not sure I've ever felt strong before. And when I feel strong, I'm less worried about how the person I see in the mirror looks, because I know she is healthy.

The finishers!

I'm sure this is not the end of the body struggles. I wish I could say that it will be over and I will never feel bad about myself again but that is obviously a lie. I also wish we lived in a world where less attention was paid to how women look and more attention was paid to things like their brains, but it seems we are still pretty far from that. So in the meantime, I promise that Curly Hair with Glasses will remain body positive and cheer you on no matter what you look like, choose to wear, or otherwise present yourself to society. We love you here, dear readers! Keep on trucking! And feel free to leave your thoughts and stories in the comments. I would love to read them.

And in honor of that love, here is one more picture of Bat Mitzvah Rachel, just because it is so funny. Never say that I don't do anything for you. Have a great weekend!

Rabbi and Mr. Alex!

Way, way back a million years ago, I wrote about my friends Alex and Alex, and their engagement party. Well, they finally got married. (ok, it was almost two months ago. I'm behind on life. It happens.) Hurrah!

The wedding was on July 3rd, so I decided to go red, white and blue. As it turned out, my whole family dressed in that color scheme as well, without even knowing it. We were all very adorable and color coordinated. Ordinarily, I would hesitate about wearing this dress to a wedding because some people are very intense about nobody wearing white (even if it covered with giant polka dots) to a wedding, but since there was no bride this time around, it seemed like a good choice. (It is actually pretty old, dating back to my graduation party four years ago, but I continue to love it and wear it when the opportunity arises.)

The cutest

 Guys, this wedding was the best. It was the perfect combo of moving and fun. It also had a little bit of a "last day of camp" feeling, since it was the last time that an awesome group of rabbis who just graduated in May were going to be together for a long time. So at the end of the night, there was a lot of crying. Guys, DON'T FORGET THAT SOME OF US AREN'T DONE WITH SCHOOL YET! PLEASE COME VISIT ME IN THE BEIT MIDRASH WHILE I TRY TO WRITE MY DISSERTATION! All of my friends are leaving me...

Abe tried to teach me to take selfies, but then I couldn't do it so he did it instead.

 Meanwhile, the happy grooms have moved to Ohio, where they seem to be settling in nicely, at least according to Facebook and occasional text messages. A special shout out to Mr. Alex, who is one of the blog's biggest fans, and who is featured up front looking very dapper in his wedding suit. Rabbi and Mr, we miss you in New York! Come see us!

Zach promised he would come visit me at school!

 Anyway. The wedding! It was chill and beautiful and just right for these two lovebirds and the many people who were so happy to celebrate with them. It had a nice pintrest-y feel, which you can see in the pictures below, without feeling precious. Everything felt thoughtful without being over the top-- not always an easy balance to strike.

The happy grooms.

 And of course, most importantly, love was overflowing. The love between the two Alexes, but also among everyone in the room to them and for them. A lot of crying, even more laughing, and dancing until they told us we really had to leave and go home.

truth.

So mazel tov, dear friends! May every coming day be as happy as that one was, for you and for all of us.

In Praise of Rash Guards and Waterproof Cameras

Out of order blog post! I live so dangerously!

I have my reasons. Namely, it is August. For many, it is vacation season. (If you're me, it's "should be writing my dissertation but instead am doing anything else" season.) So this seemed like a good time to write about two of my favorite summer things: rash guards and underwater cameras.

Rash guard, in action.

 I have written before about my love of rash guards. They serve a great dual purpose by being both modest and sun-protecting. But in the case of this one, they can also be super fun! I love me some tie dye, but as I am not 16 and it is not 1965, I feel silly wearing it. However, swimwear is often a great opportunity to wear things I wouldn't wear otherwise. So there you go!

The second cool thing in this post is my underwater camera! I bought it last year and had great fun with it, but this was my first time hardcore using it (in this case, in the pool.) It feels a little against everything you have ever been told about electronics to bring your camera in the pool. But what cool results!

Photo credit: Simon

These pictures were taken in Washington, CT, at the home of a very generous student of mine, who lent us his house for the weekend. The children, who were with us, enjoyed the whole thing immensely and especially thought that the camera was great fun. Leo especially wanted to play with it all day. I put a stop to using it as a ball to play catch with or a diving ring, but other than that, anything went.

Even Maddie got in on the fun. Not on the picture taking, but on the rash guard and swimming in the lala (that's Maddie for pool.) A beautiful weekend was had by all.

I confess that my rash guard is from Lands End. The honest fact of the matter is that their swimming stuff is, in my opinion, better than almost anyone's. Unfortunately, I have been not especially inclined to buy from them since they apologized for featuring Gloria Steinem because of her feminism. Um, hello Lands End. It's 2016. People should be embarrassed for NOT being feminists. Luckily my swimwear was all acquired before any of this happened, so I don't need to have qualms, but I'm not sure I can recommend buying from them right now.

Big feet, little feet. Photo credit: Leo

 However, I CAN recommend my waterproof camera! Totally worth the less than $150. There are other, better models that cost a lot more, but I was pretty happy with the pictures, especially the one of Simon. You can decide how you want to spend your money. You can find it here.

Maddie loves the lala

Enjoy your August everyone! Keep that skin protected, go outside, and take lots of pictures! See ya next week.

The Classiest Fail

Dear readers, by now you know that my sisters and I might just be the classiest people in the land. I mean, we wear black tie and drink in fancy hotel bars with $20 ice cream sundaes. (We already find the ice cream, because just we're classy, that doesn't mean we don't have our priorities straight.)

So about a month ago, we decided to be classy at a rooftop bar for fancy drinks round two, and to cross something else off the SBL 2.0. However, when we showed up, it was not classy (a surprise trashy Mexican theme) and it also was so full that they were not even taking names for the waiting list anymore. But never fear! When being classy, it is always good to have a back-up plan, which is why I suggested that we go north a few blocks to the Campbell Apartment.

Yup, that's right. A dress code. Because CLASSY!

I had been there once before. It's a place you would never spot, with a tiny entrance on the Vanderbilt Avenue side of Grand Central terminal. However, if you know it's there, it is TOTALLY worth checking out. The drinks are pricey, but only slightly more so than if you got cocktails anywhere else. And you get to feel so old timey and fancy, which is just great fun.

Sorry not to have a picture of the three of us together, but all of them were woefully unflattering of at least one of us, and it seemed mean to put that on the blog. Instead, here is a picture of our three fancy drinks:

The space was designed as a private apartment for a railroad executive in Grand Central, but apparently he never actually stayed there. However, the parlor/ living room, where the bar is, seems ideal for entertaining. It has high ceilings and marble walls and fancy lanterns and a great speak easy sort of feel. Even I, the one who does not enjoy drinking or bars, wanted to stay longer. So while the rooftop bar remains on the bucket list, I would call this delay well worth it.

Finally, how beautiful is this dress? I got it a few Stitch Fixes ago. I've been trying to only keep things I really love, which means I've been sending almost everything back, but this was something I knew I would be too sad to return. It is totally my shape, just the right length, and a beautiful blue color. Every time I wear it, I feel even happier. And classy :)

What I'm wearing: Maggy London dress via Stitch Fix (available here, but for more than I paid), Boden cardigan, b.o.c. sandals (similar here)

SBL 2.0: Family 5K Day/ You Can't Handle the Ruth

Here is the continuation of last week's blog post-- the time we ran the 5K in the 10000% humidity.

Here's the story. Our original plan was to "run" (it's a relative term) a family 5K on Mother's Day, before we did our usual event of eating a lot of brunch. But then we went to the baptism and were worried about not making it in time, so we pushed off the race until Memorial Day. But then the forecast was for crazy rain, so my parents bailed. LAME. So off the sisters went, with a Simon in tow, to represent the family in a great feat of athletic prowess.

In the end, it didn't rain. That being said, the race probably would have been more pleasant if it had. It instead was so humid that my glasses kept fogging up and we were all sweating before we even started running.

This was the view out of the tram.

Gloomy indeed. But we persevered. The challenge of running with Simon is, he likes to sprint for about 10 seconds and then starts complaining about how he's too tired/ his skin is itchy/ he doesn't want to run anymore. Apparently seven year olds are not known for their endurance. Eventually Rebecca, who was somewhat injured anyway, stayed back to walk with him, and Sarah and I ran the last two miles and then circled back to finish with them again.

Eventually, we all made it across the finish line. Points for all of us. Even Simon smiled for a minute (before reverting to his signature Simon Scowl.)

This race was more for fun than for anything else, but it also kicked off my "time to get my butt into gear" time. That has since gotten to be more for real (as this was more than a month ago), and it will only get to be more so in August. Last week I ran to the Little Red Lighthouse and then most of the way back (I would say I probably ran about 8 of 9.5 miles, if not consecutively), so we are on our way. Except for the part where I periodically wonder why I decided that it would be fun to try to run 13 miles. Unclear.

The Simon Scowl. Patent Pending.

You might notice that all of our t-shirts are coordinated. They are from the Look Human RBG line, which is a favorite of mine, since RBG is so freaking cool. But also, as you might know, my mom's name is Ruth, so we bought these shirts in honor of Mother's Day. (See above.) One day, we will all wear them together, but in the meantime, here is part of the Ruth Crew:

Time until half marathon: 2 months, 29 days. Eek!

What I'm wearing: Look Human t-shirt, Kirkland yoga capris, Adidas sneakers via DSW (similar here), Penn hat (go Quakers!)

SBL 2.0: Let's Go... Someone?

Dear readers, I've been taking a social media break. I even had Sarit change my Facebook password so I couldn't cheat. (Except Instagram, I guess, but that is not particularly time intensive.) It's been interesting to see how much time I waste on the internet. (A lot.) Also how much harder it is to waste time without Facebook. (Also a lot.) This is unlikely to be a permanent switch, but it's been an interesting experiment.

Citi Field, and some cool clouds...

 Anyway. Way back in the day (i.e. Memorial Day Weekend), we took on another Bucket List activity and took Simon to a Mets game. Simon, in an act of rebellion against his father, has openly declared his hatred for the Red Sox. I was very proud. (Sorry Bostonians.) However, since he is eight, he not yet mastered the idea of cheering for one team. Instead, he has created a hierarchy: 1. Dodgers, 2. Yankees, 3. Mets. This will become relevant in a minute.

Since the Dodgers are a West Coast team, they tend to only come to New York once a year. Simon really misses his (former hometown) team. That is how we found ourselves with an 8 year old, decked in Dodgers gear, for a game that began at 8:00 PM. Forget Simon's bedtime, that's late for me.

Yay Someone! It's much less stressful when your team isn't playing...

 Luckily, it was a beautiful evening, and I was wearing one of my favorite Stitch Fix shirts that I got during the blog hiatus. You can see it better in the picture above, but it combines some of my favorite things: stripes, lace, 3/4 sleeves, and softness. So I was dressed and ready to go.

We were sitting three rows from the back of the stadium behind home plate, because that is where the cheap tickets are. It's actually a great view from above, as you can see below, and it was a particularly beautiful sunset. The top deck in the back is also where the hardcore fans sit, as opposed to those who sit on the field level in their fancy pants, so I was a little worried about people yelling at Simon in his Dodgers gear, especially because the Mets and Dodgers have some serious bad blood after last year's National League Championship Series. Luckily, nobody said anything to him, despite booing lustily every time Chase Utley came to bat.

We ended up leaving in the eighth inning because it was almost 11:00, and because I have horrible memories of getting stuck in a traffic jam trying to get out of Citi Field, and thus being stuck in the parking lot for an hour. Simon was so tired that he started say, "I don't care who wins. I just want it to be over." The Dodgers had been winning 2-0 for most of the game. As we turned on the radio in the car, the Mets tied it up, but ultimately, the Dodgers prevailed in the 9th, 4-2, just as it started to pour. Simon was a happy camper.

Help! How does one take a selfie???

And then, despite the late hour, we got up and ran a 5K the next morning in 1,000,000% humidity. More on that soon...

What I'm wearing: 41Hawthorn shirt via Stitch Fix, Gap cropped khakis (similar here)

I'm Baaaaaack! And a Baptism.

Oh hello there! Remember me?

I know, you thought I was never coming back. But here I am! By popular request. (No, really. Thanks to those of you who cared enough to ask me to resurrect the blog. This is for you.)

Anyway. It is not springtime, at least sort of, although May in New York has felt like more like March, and I'm currently in Israel where it was 106 degrees two days ago. So maybe more in theory than in practice.

The reason I mention this is to explain the pictures below, where I am wearing tights, despite the fact that it is May, thus going against everything I believe in.

On Mother's Day, my cousins Paul and Stephanie celebrated the baptism of their twin daughters, Alina and Malia (who have been on the blog before, as seen here.) The girls, who are identical twins, came home from the hospital exactly one year prior, so it was so nice to be able to celebrate that occasion. Also, my Uncle David and Aunt Champa (the babies' grandparents, of Nepal fame) are going back into the Peace Corp, this time to Moldova, so this was the last family gathering for a couple of years, sadly.

This was actually my first baptism (maybe not surprisingly), but the priest did a great job explaining each step of the way so us newbies could follow along. Yes, we are a very diverse family. Everyone got into it, including Leo, who I had to stop from crossing himself when the Priest explained how, and Maddie, who can be seen below reading her hymnal very carefully.

Here's the beautiful immediate family:

And our extended family. It's hard to get a picture where everyone looks good at once, so this wasn't Simon's best shot, but there we all were together.

I had gotten the perfect baptism-appropriate dress in my last Stitch Fix, but when I woke up that morning it was freezing and raining, and I didn't want to be cold all day. So instead I went with this dress I got from Boden a few months ago, which I like a lot despite the fact that wearing horizontal stripes can be controversial. What can I say, I live dangerously. I paired it with black tights and booties, and a black cropped cardigan, which maybe wasn't the most springy look, but was ridiculously weather appropriate even though it was May. The beautiful flowered dress will have to wait for better weather. Stay tuned.

What I'm wearing: Boden dress, Boden cardigan, Hue tights, Crown Vintage booties via DSW