A CHWG First! A Guest Blogger and Stitch Fix for Men

Big things happening on the blog today, people! My friend Mike, whose daughter Ivy will marry my nephew Simon on day if their lives proceed as planned (as the lives of eight year olds always do) got his first Stitch Fix. What's that? You didn't know that men could have Stitch Fixes too? Well, now they can! Read on, and then get in on the fun yourself. And now, I hand it over to Mike, who is at least as funny as me, if not funnier:

Guys, I’m chiming in here for a guest blog for two main reasons: 1) Stitch Fix now carries men’s clothes and 2) I’m totes procrastinating from doing my dissertation! UGH am I right? (Technically this is true; I am also procrastinating from enrolling in graduate school). My name is Mike and I am connected to Rachel and fam through Rachel’s sister Rebecca, although I potentially may be machatunen [editor's note: that is the parents-in-law's relationship with each other] with the clan in the future as Rachel’s nephew Simon and my daughter Ivy have been besherit [editor's note: made for each other] since they met at age 2. It’s true love, like The Notebook on fleek. (Is that a proper use of “on fleek”? In other news, I’m 37).

Anyhoo, as a more or less male version of Rachel (curly hair, glasses, totally addicted to cookies!), I decided that I was the perfect person to answer her call for a blog post about the new men’s Stitch Fix. Serendipitously, I had already received my first “Man Fix” (trademark pending) when she posted about it, as my wife, the lovely Kimbo, is a big Stitch Fix fan since way back in the day (2015?) and convinced me to join up as she would get a discount for conning persuading me to enlist.

About my style: I work at a law firm (not a lawyer, just play one on TV) so my M-F clothing is relatively conservative business casual. Otherwise I’m pretty laid-back on the style front – jeans, cool sneaks, and a T shirt or untucked sassy button-down is my preferred weekend gear. Occasionally I go tuxedo on the top, Speedo on the bottom [editor's note: Mike, that is NOT modest! Or fashionable], but that’s for a different blog…

Filling out the Stitch Fix style profile online was pretty easy, though it was lengthy and there seemed to be a time limit on it, like I was buying Tom Petty tickets and if I didn’t enter my credit card information fast enough, my loge level seats would be released back into the wild. I liked a lot of the looks and was eager to get my first box.

And the box did not disappoint! I received 3 tops, a pair of jeans, and fun socks. 

The jeans were excellent – stylish black jeans that were a little tight from the knee down, like half-skinny, half-normie. I easily would have paid $100+ for them in a store, though they were listed as less than $100 (don’t have the exact price because I threw out the sheet and can’t figure out how to see past Fixes online; I know, I have failed you).

The first shirt, a purple button-down, was exactly my style – way to go, Fixers! Good for work, date night, parent/teacher conference, public hangings, etc. 

The second shirt is one I would have walked right past had I seen it in a store, because the plaid pattern is a little much; also it is a heavier material, and I live in LA, where it’s cold for maybe 10 days a year. However, it really works – great fit, and the pattern is growing on me. A keeper!

The hoodie is also something I would have walked past in a store, because it’s not a traditional hoodie – lighter weight and more fashion-forward than the hoodies I usually wear (which are more in the “I have no interest in showering or getting dressed today so I am gonna totes procrastinate from writing my dissertation in this bigass hoodie” category). However, since I was definitely keeping the jeans and purple shirt, and was leaning toward keeping the other button-down, it made sound financial sense to keep the hoodie, and learn to love it. Which I will!

Lastly, the socks. As you may be able to tell from these photos, I am a giant person, and my feet are just outside the range of normal human feet (size 14). Though I enjoy fun socks in theory, I have a hard time finding them in my size because most “one size fits all” men’s socks are made for shoe sizes 6-13, which you Mathletes out there might recognize as smaller than 14. In fact, on the Stitch Fix site when asked to enter my shoe size, 14 wasn’t even an option – they stopped at 13! I entered in a note saying that my shoe size was actually 14, but apparently no one read that as I got standard-size socks, which though fun were a bit small. As it behooved me to keep the socks for the “buy the whole box” discount, I gifted them to my brother-in-law, who promptly forgot them at my house. So there ya go.

All in all I saved a ton of money on 4 great pieces without ever having to enter a dressing room, which I hate. Super win! Thanks to Rachel for handing over her blog to me this week, and see you on the Interwebs!

Ok guys, I'm back now. Many thanks to Mike for getting on the fun! I hope you all enjoyed this foray into men's modest fashion. My fix is supposed to come in a week and a half, so more Fix fun here soon! And in the meantime-- don't delay-- order your Fix now!

The Time I Accidentally Walked to Brooklyn (and Back)

Guys, thanks for all of your kind responses on my last post. It's nice to have all of you on my team! Sarah and I are running the Bronx 10 Miler on Sunday morning, so please cheer from us from your beds, which is where normal people (without children) are on Sunday mornings.

One of the new things that happened this summer is that I kept finding myself in Brooklyn. What's that about? Honestly, I am usually one of those obnoxious Manhattanites who complains about how far away Brooklyn is from everything. But that's mostly because usually I would go on the weekend, when subways are all wonky and it takes forever. But in the summer, when I have more time, I discovered that Brooklyn is not actually so far away! (I know, I know. No need to say anything. At least I admit to my obnoxiousness.)

And I discovered all of this partly when, purely by accident, I ended up walking from my apartment on the Upper West Side to Brooklyn one Sunday.

What??? You say. That's crazy! And yes, it was a little, mostly because I wasn't wearing sneakers, which meant my feet really hurt at the end of the day. My Naot are comfortable, but not that comfortable. But I did it!

Here is what happened. I made plans with my friend Samantha to walk across the Manhattan Bridge. However, I had a few other plans over the course of the day, each of which found me walking progressively further south, rather than getting on the subway, because I am cheap and don't have an unlimited ride Metrocard, which means that I sometimes do crazy things like walk to Brooklyn. By the time I reached the west 20s, it became clear that the easiest way to meet Samantha was to just keep walking. So I did. And then we walked across the bridge, and then decided to walk back across the Brooklyn Bridge. (Don't worry, then we went straight to the subway.) I didn't smell great by the end, honestly. But man, those bridges are gorgeous.

See?

And now, time to go back to work. The prospectus might be sort of almost ready to go to my committee! And also, today is a VERY big day. But I'm not telling why yet. Want to know more? Come back next time!

One Month to Go! So I'm Getting Real.

Guys, it has been a big week. I saw my first ever ocean reacting to a tropical storm. (Crazy.) I ran a 10k and set a personal best with a crazy negative split. (More on that later, including the definition of a negative split.) I wrote 15(!) pages of my dissertation proposal. (For those of you keeping track who thought I had already finished a draft, the answer is that is true, but I decided it was bad so I threw it out and started again. If you are wondering if I am insane, the answer might be yes.) And last night, I reached peak happiness, when my lifelong (or yearlong) dream was finally realized and I got to go SEE HAMILTON. Was it as good as everyone said? Yes. Did I cry for almost the whole second act? Yes. I am afraid nothing will ever be that good again? Yes. Lin Manuel Miranda, if you are reading this blog (hey, you never know!), you are a genius and I am sort of obsessed with you in a not at all creepy way. Thank you for sharing your art with the world. And please let me know how I can go again! Ok? Thanks!

This was taken after the 10k, but it could have been
me yesterday on Hamilton day.

Anyway. It is one month until HM Day, which is half-marathon day. Eek! So in honor of this occasion, I'm going to get real with all of you. Like many people (and especially women) out there, I spend way too much time worrying about how I look. I wish I didn't. I wish I felt good about my body every day, no matter what. I wish I could always focus on the amazing things my body could do, instead of what it looked like. In fact, one of the reasons I started this blog was to force myself to stop hiding, start wearing clothes that fit, and learn to talk about myself and how I look in positive ways. It's actually been a mostly successful endeavor, which I feel glad about, and I'm hoping to get back into blogging more regularly now that I'm on a regular schedule again.

Bat Mitzvah Rachel

I don't remember when I started feeling self conscious about my body. Maybe it's just (unfortunately) a normal learned behavior in our society? But either way, the larger problem for much of my adolescence was that I wasn't healthy, or treating my body well. I played sports (extremely poorly), but I also ate bagels and plain pasta basically every day and many snickers bars. Every year, I would go to the doctor and she would suggest gently that perhaps I should change my eating habits and try to lose a little weight, or at least not gain more. And every year, I would be  extremely motivated for about three days and then would go back to normal. By the time I was 14, I was 5'3", 200 pounds, and in pretty terrible shape. I wanted to look different, but I didn't know how.

The successful racers

Sometimes people ask me how I lost all that weight. The answer is a complicated one. First, I didn't lose it all at once. It came off in blocks, and then it would stop again. Second, I never decided to go on a diet. Instead, I decided to try to eat more salad and discovered I actually liked many vegetables. I stopped buying so many candy bars. I tried to stop eating my feelings. (It worked sometimes.) Third, I got an iPod. I know this sounds weird, but it really changed my relationship to exercise. When I didn't have to lug around a discman (remember those????) going to the gym or for a run was suddenly more more enjoyable.

The struggle still continued, and does sometimes. I try to focus on how I feel and how my clothes fit, rather than a number on a scale. These days, I also do some strength training, which is a new challenge for me and sometimes makes me feel very hardcore (like the time I did 10 push ups and then leg pressed my body weight! Yes, I did make people congratulate me. I'm not ashamed.) I also realized that exercise helps me with my anxiety, which means that when I feel bad, I specifically try to get myself outside. It doesn't always work, but there is something to be said for the idea that one healthy choice leads to another.

So proud of my mom, who ran her first 5K!

 The other thing I realized, though, is that I feel really STRONG right now. And that's so cool! I'm not sure I ever felt this strong before. I first felt it consciously on Sunday, when, as the 10K went on, I started running faster, instead of running out of steam. I ended up doing the second 3 miles more than a minute and a half faster than the first three miles (that's a negative split), which is something that I've never done before. And when I was done, I felt like I could keep going, instead of totally exhausted and beaten down. Obviously this is a good thing, since I'm supposed to run 13 miles in exactly one month. But it's also really amazing because I'm not sure I've ever felt strong before. And when I feel strong, I'm less worried about how the person I see in the mirror looks, because I know she is healthy.

The finishers!

I'm sure this is not the end of the body struggles. I wish I could say that it will be over and I will never feel bad about myself again but that is obviously a lie. I also wish we lived in a world where less attention was paid to how women look and more attention was paid to things like their brains, but it seems we are still pretty far from that. So in the meantime, I promise that Curly Hair with Glasses will remain body positive and cheer you on no matter what you look like, choose to wear, or otherwise present yourself to society. We love you here, dear readers! Keep on trucking! And feel free to leave your thoughts and stories in the comments. I would love to read them.

And in honor of that love, here is one more picture of Bat Mitzvah Rachel, just because it is so funny. Never say that I don't do anything for you. Have a great weekend!